Looking for Mr. Sugar Daddy...

So, when you are an actor starting out in a new acting class, you begin to realize it's cool to have daddy issues( mommy issues work too). You can't come to class perfect, that's the equivalent of coming into an acting class and being republican or hating gay people. 

Some people weren't blessed with daddy issues, therefor in order to fit in they create their own internal imperfections. This ranges from drug addiction, to eating disorders, to the constant need to be perfect. Then if those issues don't find their way into your life, then you are inflicted with arrogant self centerness. Which, in my opinion, is worst than all the above.

I've always been cool in the acting/artist world. I mean I'm versatile in the problem area. I can relate to daddy issues. Loving someone that doesn't love you. Being pale when the world wants you to be tan. Having a pimple that makes people not look you in the eye. I've even had two pimples, that make the eyes bounce back and forth, not knowing which one is more important. I mean I've even gone to bed skinny and woke up fat...But, I always perserve. 

The thing about having daddy or pimple issues, is everyone can relate. Therefore, you are cool in the acting world. I am cool, is really the point I'm getting at. 

So, when I conquered the initial pressures of fitting in, I was then bombarded with the starving artist gig. 

I don't like it. Other people romanticism it, making it sound like it "Ohh my art is so greaaat because all I do is eat lettuce and express myself. 

I express myself better after I've had a spray tan, my nails done, the hair did, and then shop therapy ( which includes a sexy, but classic outfit with matching shoes and purse.) Plus, I like a fine dinner, with a glass of wine out accompanied with  a medium rare steak...

And , then let's say I'm in a responsible mood. I have to buy vitamins, and fresh vegetables, postage, nice paper for my resumes, and a new intellectual book that challenges my beliefs or teaches me something new.  

It's exhausting. I  can't afford me. 

Which is why, I really think I would be the best match for a sugar daddy. Preferably , a young good looking one. I would make them happy. I would entertain them. I would devote my life to making them laugh, and they could devote their life to spending their money on me. 

I mean SAKS isn't calling. Mom's not paying. It's just me and real life budgeting. 

So please sir, if you could come into my life and spare a couple thous. I would be much appreciative. 

I mean I have art to create. I'd like to eat more than lettuce for dinner. 

Thanks.